In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
