either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
Randomize
