Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Randomize
