white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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