I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
