Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Vodka?
Forever.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
