Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize