Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
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