I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
I need to calm my uterus...
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
wow bdsm is so cute
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Randomize