Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Randomize