she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
