I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
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