How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I have aggressive nipples.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Randomize