The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Randomize
