Three words: puerto rican gang bang
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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