Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
Randomize
