She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize