I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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