Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
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