Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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