I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
FUCK WHALES
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize