you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Randomize
