do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Randomize
