Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
