3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
