Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
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