Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
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