Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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