just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
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