You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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