Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
Randomize
