You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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