Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
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