I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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