I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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