and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize
