Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
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