Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
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