I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
Randomize
