she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize