just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Randomize
