elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
We had sex on a dog bed..
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Randomize
