...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
I wish i was in the wii world.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
