he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
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