i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Randomize
