Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
i think i scared a bird with my dick
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
Randomize
