i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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