when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
Apparently last night I sat at the bar with an upside down sharpie lightning bolt on my forehead, yelling "It's Harry Potter's birthday! Let me be on the qudditch team!" And I kept calling the bartender Dobby. There are videos.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Randomize
