Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
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