i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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