Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Randomize
